August 28... grab a cup of coffee, this is a long post. :-) If you are just joining it, read the previous entry first.
At Emily's doctor's appt in June when this all began, we started out with a basic blood test to see what was going on. My fear was that Emily might have diabetes. That would be my worst nightmare.
Emily had gained 40 pounds in 2 years. Another one of those "I didn't see it coming" moments. What kind of parent lets this happen!?! Emily had also grown close to a foot in those 2 years but that amount of weight gain was scary. I was worried that there might be something else wrong -- maybe metabolic or even something genetic going on. She is so tall for her age (11 years old and 5'8). Her shoe size was at a 12. And there was no way this 11 year old was done growing. A base line blood test would be our start.
You'd think I would not have been surprised when the doctors office called with the results. I didn't expect to get a glowing report but the news from the other end was heart wrenching. The results were not good, but thankfully, they were not as bad as they could have been. Thank God, Emily did not have diabetes... but she was sitting on that doorstep. No thyroid problem. No growth issues. Just all the problems that go along with being so overweight. My child had become a statistic. She is the person the newspapers and TV talked about every other night about the crisis in America and I was the parent who let it happen.
While this was going on, I couldn't help but think back that Tom and I had a similar, but more detailed, blood test done in Janaury called the Berkley Heart Test. It looks at your cardiovascular risk markers and genetic tests that determine risk characteristics for heart disease and heart attack. You have heard the stories of the perfectly healthy athlete out for a morning run and he drops dead of a heart attack? This test tells you your risk of heart disease and likely hood of that happening. Whether you are fit or fat, thin or thick, it is amazing and empowering to know what's going on inside your body and knowing that most of it can be improved or controlled to stop getting worse and even improve it! Robert is one of only 2 physicians in Augusta, that I know of, who orders this test and then can explain the results and help you develop a plan to prevent problems.
Even though Tom and I had the test done in January this year, I was obviously *not* interested in hearing the results because we waited 3 months to meet with Robert to review them. I really thought Tom's test would have more issues than me. He's much older, has arthritis, and a family history of heart disease. I had none of that. I was sure they were going to just tell me to lose weight.
When we went in for our Berkley results, I was floored. Tom only had 1 or 2 things to work on in his blood results - his risk factors for heart disease and a heart attack were low. That was great! Me, on the other hand, not so good. There was as much "red" on that print-out the doctor was holding than on a first graders paper after a college-level algebra test! WHAT? I'm young, feel great, no heart issues in my family! There is no way that just being overweight could cause all this?! I was *sorely* mistaken. I obvioulsy live on the "plug-my-ears-close-my-eyes-and-hum-really-loud-so-i-can-pretend-i-have-no-idea-whats-going-on-around-me" planet. There were only 2 or 3 areas that I *didn't* have bad numbers. Ya woulda thought that would have been my wake up call to take action! But it wasn't. I did nothing about it. Nothing. N-o-t-h-i-n-g! I'd worry about it TOMORROW.
That was in March and here we are drawing Emily's blood in June - my "mini-me". This child who was within 5 pounds as me, as tall as me, and ate like me, why did I think her results would be any different than mine? But it never, ever, *EVER* occurred to me that in her few short years, that her results would even come close to mine. I had 40 years to destroy my body, she's only at a handful. Strike 2 for me.
Emi's fasting insulin levels were high like mine, her metabolism was low like mine, triglycerides were high - ditto for me, bad cholesterol was high -yup for me too, and the worst part was her coronary heart ratio was above the high point of the range. Guess what club she just joined? The one I was leading. She about mirrored me. Do you know what that means? It means my 11yo child had high risk of coronary disease and a heart attack. SHE IS ELEVEN! I beat myself up for days. I still do. I hated myself. Tom was out of town so I was dealing with this news solo. What was I thinking all these years? How did I let this happen? Why did I not take this seriously a year ago, 2 or 3 years ago? Didn't I love her or care about her? I just helped her health fall apart. I HELPED HER GET HERE!! There is no amount of consoling that would take that fact away.
Emily's test results combined also equaled metabolic syndrome. Her body did not burn fat efficiently and that was probably why even our small attempts at weight watchers or cutting back or just "eating better" were futile in the past. If the furnace is not lit, ain't nothin' gonna burn.
So what does all that mean? It means that just cutting back on food or just walking a little more were not going to work. At this point, we had to reset her metabolism to get it going again. We had to retrain her body to burn fat and function better. It meant we had to give it the food it needed and it was not what we were currently eating.
During this meeting and in the days that followed, I learned so much from Robert and his wife Gail about how the body works, how it deals with foods, how all these factors played into disease as well as health. I also learned that all Emily's issues were completely reversible but the time was NOW and it was up to me. I had a choice to either make a change and suck it up and take the anger that would surely ensue from my kids or just give up, say this would be too hard for me to do, be too far out of my comfort zone, and just keep on the way we were because it was easier on me.
Emily was 100% curable and I could cure her but I could not wait for tomorrow. After all the guilt I had of what I had done TO her, by the grace of God, I was given a chance to HELP her. What a gift of encouragement for me! I was never more "in" to meeting a challenge than this one before me. I had to redeem myself and be the mom I had not been and change everything my family knew about food. And I knew they would HATE me on the way.
Robert said we only have 2 rules to follow. Well that sounds EASY!! 2 rules!! Bring 'em on! No books to read, no 'points' to count, no journals or diaries to keep. All that was too much work and it was not a lifestyle and probably would not be maintained for long. I had to keep in mind that kids have different nutritional needs than adults so my old college way of dieting by just not eating all day and drinking diet soda would not work. We needed something we could live with forever -- we needed a new way to EXIST. If I wanted to fix this mess I caused, all I had to do was 2 things: remove flour and added-sugar from our diet..............................................
And then there was the longest pause EVER heard in the universe. Say again? We have to eliminate WHAT? And I began to doubt my ability to succeed.
I immediately started thinking that this was impossible. Flour and sugar was probably an ingredient in 90% of our diet if I really thought about it. Cereal for breakfast or pancakes with syrup. Sandwiches on bread for lunch. Spaghetti for dinners. Spaghetti was a main food group in our house!! Right up there with Cherrios every morning! What would be left? But, therein was the root of our health problems. If we were continue to put the wrong gas in our "car", sooner or later, the engine was going to shut off. There just was no other choice. NO OTHER CHOICE.
After I got over the initial 5-minutes of shock and processed what I was hearing, Robert and I got down to the nuts and bolts of how this would work. He said he tells the patients in his obesity clinic the same thing but many of them give up before they start or try it for a week and quit. Too hard. Too much work. They don't agree with him. It's "not normal" for them. I can see where they are coming from but I just can't imagine that option of saying no. I mean, really, how many "up-sides" are there to diabetes or heart disease staring you in the face for your child???
I have now dubbed myself as the "Food Nazi". I was getting ready to embark on a venture that would make my kids HATE me and test my own limits. You have to know that I KNEW that I KNEW the kids would NOT agree with this, they would fight me every inch of the way! I could only imagine the tears that were gonna flow as soon as this plan was launched at our house. There was no way any of my kids were going to do this happily or willfully. I was going to be the most hated and loathed human on the face of the earth. But you know what, I knew my kids could not hate me any more than I hated myself for getting us here in the first place. I needed to suck it up and *be the mom*! This was not a popularity contest and I was not in this to make friends. I was going to do what was BEST for them knowing all along I was going to win the Meanest and Most Hated Mom of the Year Award. Let the voting begin.
Here's the 2 simple eating rules of our new life with a little more detail...
#1: Flour.
None. Nodda. Zip. Gone. So what does THAT mean? It all comes down to one thing -- reading the ingredient label on the package. If the word FLOUR is in the list of ingredients, that food was off limits in our house. Period. No exceptions. White flour, bleached or unbleached flour, wheat, stone ground, semolina - if it says "flour" in the ingredients on the box, it had to go. For the past 4+ years, we had been eating bread made with 100% stone ground flour thinking we were doing a good thing. No white bread here -- that was bad -- only stone ground flour for us! I thought I had been making these great choices with eating wheat products instead of white. That was supposed to be the healthy choice. I have so much to learn.
Robert explained to me why flour had to go... even whole wheat or stone ground flour - the stuff I thought was good. From my layman interpretation, with upfront apologies to Robert for getting ready to give the worst medical interpretation of body processes ever given on the face of the earth, here goes: flour is digested by the body quickly since it has been already ground down to it's finest form. It's been pulverized for me outside my body so my body doesn't have to do any work to digest it after I eat it. The flour turns to sugar (hope I'm saying that right) and our body gets an immediate sugar rush which gives us fast energy. It also causes an insulin spike to deal with that influx of sugar and since Emily has insulin issues, we have to give the pancreas a break. If it keeps pumpin' out tons of insulin because of all the constant sugar, one day it will stop. That's when insulin shots are needed for your new friend, diabetes. After the sugar spikes, it drops fast, your body energy drops, you are tired and moody and begin to crave your next fix of sugar. And the cycle repeats. My new job was to starve Emily's body of that sugar spike. OK... flour is gone. For all of us.
If you stop and think about it, what in your diet has flour? It would probably be easier to tell you what *didn't* have flour. In our house, all cereal had to go. That one item would be enough to cause my kids to want to move in with their Mimi. Crackers were gone, bread too. Tortillas, chips, pretzels, croutons, muffins, pasta, cookies, pancakes, baking mixes, cookies, sweets... it all had to go. Did you know many canned soups have flour as an ingredient?? Really?!? It had to go too. I had to re-learn how to read labels again on everything I purchased and if that one little simple word was in the ingredient list, it had to go. I challenge you -- go check your pantry. I think you will be floored at all the stuff that has flour. Now imagine that you threw it all away. I did... and it was not a pretty site. My neighbors thought we were moving out since we donated bags and bags and bags of food to their house.
So you might be thinking, why did I "torture" my entire family when only 2 of us were overweight? Why didn't just Emily and I do this and leave everyone else alone? Here's what I also learned from Robert... no one in my family will be hurt with this way of eating. Each one of them could benefit on a different level if they did this too. There is no downside for even a skinny person to drop the flour. And since every person in my family could stand to lose 5 or 10 pounds, even my 8year old who is NOT overweight, everyone could benefit. I also knew that even if the rest of the family was not in the danger zone today like Emily and me, how much longer before they joined us if they kept eating all the wrong stuff I was feeding them which got Emily and I here in the first place? It sure would be harder to fix this problem in 5 years when they were all rebellious teenagers with much more intense schedules who were almost too old to be under the iron thumb of their mom and ate out with their friends all the time than to fix it now. I buy the food and cook it so they had to eat what I served. The could not hop in their own car and drive through McDonalds if they didn't like what I cooked. Now was the best time since I control their life. (insert devilish, cackling, hand twisting, villain laugh here).
This venture was not going to be a short term, 6-month weight loss program. This was learning new, or UN-LEARNING years of bad eating habits. If I re-teach my family now everything I am learning about food, and WHY we are doing what we are doing and HOW this food affects them, how to read a label and what to look for on that label, maybe this cycle will stop and they will not repeat it with their kids down the road. Maybe if they learn it now, they will have the knowledge and ability to make good choices when I am not there hovering over them.
We eat and live as a family and even if Emily and I were the only ones with big weight issues, this family was going to do everything it could to support each other. I was not going to single Emily and I out as the "fat people on a diet" while everyone else ate pizza. We were going to be the family who ate better regardless of how much any of us weighed. And our bodies would heal themselves in the process. We were at a cross-roads and I was determined that we were all going to do this together, for each other, because families support each other in times of need.
#2: Sugar.
The second thing on our "no-no" list was sugar. Awww, dang it!! I love sugar! It calls to me! THIS rule was gonna be tougher than flour. So I took a deep breath and had to put on my big girls panties and suck it up (as my friend Vicki would say). So here is how the no-sugar rule goes. We CAN have things with sugar BUT it cannot have "added" sugar to the ingredients. When I read the nutrition label on a product, there might be grams of sugar on the label as long as there is NO form of sugar in the list of ingredients - that would mean sugar had been ADDED to the item and that is a no-no. I have also learned how many dozens of words mean sugar... and every one of them is off-limits.... sugar, cane juice, syrups, and molasses, for a start, and a bunch of chemically sounding names for sugar -- sucralose comes to mind. I found this on a website and want to share:
Sugar (in one form or another) is added to more food products than you can imagine. There are also a large number of "variants" of sugar - depending on the kind of processing that has occurred. Here is a list to get you started in identifying sugars:
- Brown sugar
- Corn syrup
- Demerara Sugar
- Dextrose
- Free Flowing Brown Sugars
- Fructose
- Galactose
- Glucose
- High Fructose Corn Syrup
- Honey
- Invert Sugar
- Lactose
- Malt
- Maltodextrin
- Maltose
- Maple syrup
- Molasses
- Muscovado or Barbados Sugar
- Panocha
- Powdered or confectioner's sugar
- Rice Syrup
- Sucrose
- Sugar (granulated)
- Treacle
- Turbinado sugar
DANG! That's a lot!! Now remember, there CAN be sugar listed in grams on the *nutrition label*, because tomatoes might naturally have sugar in them so of course that sugar would be in the product, but there CANNOT be extra sugar added in the manufacturing process. The sugar has to come naturally from the ingredients. For instance, we can have applesauce as long as it's unsweetened. That means they haven't added *extra* sugar to the already high sugar content of apples themselves. The ingredient labels says "apples, water". That's it. So apples are OK on this diet but *sweetened* applesauce is not. Our salsa, as another example, has 2g of sugar on the nutrition label but when you read the ingredients, it only lists tomatoes, chilis, water, spices - no form of "sugar" is in the ingredients so our salsa is ok even though it says there are 2g of sugar per serving -- the sugar is naturally occurring from the ingredients. Does that make sense?
If I thought we were going to lose 70% of our pantry when the flour was gone, another 25% is about to be thrown out with this little sugar "no-no" rule. Robert reminded me that sugar is NOT on the food pyramid and our body does not need it to survive. Good point. I'm sure the kids would understand now and be 100% willing to go along with this gleefully. :-) NOT! To them, sugar is the other major food group after spaghetti and cheerios.
Now, more of the Jennifer's non-medical re-hashing of how sugar hurts us. Sugar, like flour, digests quickly thus raising that insulin level needed to process it in our body. Our body reacts to the sugar with a rush of energy which, after digested, drops our blood sugar level so quickly that your body craves more to keep going. Like cigarettes having nicotine, you get a rush from it and after that "high", your body craves more and it will not rest until you feed the craving. My job was to starve our bodies of it's craving for sugar and flour and retrain our body to stop looking for the quick fix of sugar to burn but to retrain the body to start burning fat instead. The only way to do that is to eliminate sugar and flour completely... and by completely, I mean COMPLETELY. With NO CHEATING. We have to give our body no other choice but to turn to burning stored fat and burning it quicker and more efficiently.
This will be a good time for me to remind you again that this is my nutritional interpretation of what a very smart and educated man was so patiently trying to explain to me. I'm sure some of you medical people out there can say it better and might even tell me I have my facts mixed up but it really doesn't matter. I heard the key points as no sugar, no flour and NO CHEATING while we worked to reset Emily's metabolism. I don't need to understand it completely, that's what Robert has spent many many years learning. I'm a good follower if you give me a plan. There is no time to learn the details of why this would work, I just had to have faith that he said it would. There was a medical reason for everything we were doing from a doctor I VERY much trusted.
So how long are we talking about here? How long do we have to do this? The word forever scared me. It might take 2 weeks, 4, or even 6 weeks for Emily's body to change and kick her metabolism into a higher gear. Everyone is different so my initial focus was let's tackle this for 6-weeks. We will go 100% commando and do this perfectly for 6 weeks and re-evaluate. School began in 6-weeks so that would be a good point to re-evaluate. So that's what I aimed for. I can do this for 6-weeks. Then we'll go for another 6-weeks. I figured that if it took me a few years to destroy by body, it might take a *little* longer than 6-weeks to fix it so that will just be check-point #1.
I liked that this was not a fab book with the diet flavor of the month in it. I had to be a 100%, completely focused Food-Nazi and give my child's body time to reset its metabolism so it started burning food more efficiently so her body would work FOR her, not against her. I had to give her body time to heal itself with food after all these years of letting food hurt it. 6 weeks is do-able for anyone. And I could either have them mad at me for 6 weeks now because they could not have cheerios and had to eat more fruit or despise me as a 300-pound sick and overweight adult with major health issues that has shortened their life expectancy in 20 years. Really, is there a choice? However you want to explain it, that was the bottom line.
Failure could not be an option in this game. This was not a trial run. We were going to move forward one meal at a time. I put on my bullet-proof vest and was going into battle for my kids and dragging them behind me, like it or not. I'm the adult and their whining would not win. There is too much at stake. Now I had to figure out what we were going to eat for dinner and how I was going to tell the kids.
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